Sunday, January 18, 2009

My heart lately! :)


So... I’m not sure how many people know, but life has not been easy at all for my family lately. It is close to a year and a half since my dad lost his job. Often people ask how we have survived or can stand it and honestly im not sure myself. Except that I know God has been there every step of the way. Earlier this week I was seriously ready to throw the white flag in or for lack of better words just give up. You know I just kept thinking, " I cant make it anymore", "it isn’t worth it", "Why would God do this?", but God wouldn’t let me give up. Im sure there are many people in the same boat or similar situations where it seems hopeless. But it isn't... Just to be totally honest I was sick and tired of hearing people say, "God will work it out" or "God is in control!". I wanted to scream, WHERE THE HECK IS HE WHEN I CANT SEE ANY REASON TO LIVE OR IM CRYING MYSELF TO SLEEP!! You know what though? He has been there every step of the way and will continue to be... Its not over and probably is no where near being over, but I have hope! I have sincere hope that my God will NOT leave me! He promises! Im not sure what you are going through and I may never know, but God does. When He promises to be there for you He means it! There are NO limitations to God! Im not going to say much as far as money, but I will say I did not see how God was going to let us make it. Just food wise.... but He did. In miraculous ways He provided and in perfect timing! I've held on to the song that says, "He never promised that the cross would not get heavy and the hill would not be hard to climb. He never offered a victory without fighting, but He said help would always come in time!"! Hold tight to those words!! Life is not going to be easy at all! Period. But, He PROMISES that we can make it! Only with Him though.... If there is one thing I can tell you though. DO NOT GIVE UP! Satan wants nothing more than you to renounce the name of God and by giving up or just saying that it is impossible you will be doing that. So, PLEASE stay stong!! No matter what life throws at you! If you are on God's side there is no way you can loose! I've read the end of the book! ;)

I do ask you though to be praying for my family as we continue fighting this battle! It’s hard, but defiantly not impossible! Let me know if there is any way I can pray for you! I love you all! <3

Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!

James 1: 2-4 Count it all joy my brothers when you face trials of various kinds. For you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness and let steadfastness have its full effect that you may be perfect and complete lacking in nothing.

Hebrews 13:5b I will never leave you nor forsake you.

Matthew 5:3-5 More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings. Knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope and hope does not put us to shame because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy spirit who has given it to us.

In God's amazing grace,
JEN

2 comments:

Hal said...

Jennifer,
I read your blog and Ms. DeeDee and I are thinking about you and your family and praying for you.
Often we do not understand when the Lord takes us through trials but we know He is good and His plans for us are for our good. I know you already know this and it may sound hollow at the time but it is true, none the less.
I believe the Lord is giving you the experience so that one day you can use it to help someone that is not as strong as you in their walk with the Lord.
It is okay to cry out to God and tell Him you are hurting. He loves it when we talk with Him and tell Him our hurts.
The wonderful thing is , your Dad is strong and God has given him big shoulders to bear this burden for his family as God bears it for him.
If you need to talk please contact Ms. DeeDee or me anytime.

Gripped by His Grace,
Bro. Hal

melissajeffers said...

Jennifer you are so wise. I hope that I am able to teach my boys the wisdom that your parents have taught you through homeschooling...