Saturday, August 21, 2010


Hey girls!

Sorry this is a day late... I had orientation at College all day yesterday and just didnt have time to blog, but I was praying all day that God would give me something to say. Just like His normal self.. He did!

Anyway, lately we haven't really hit the subject of purity much. We've talked about other subjects that needed to be discussed, but they haven't really been related to purity. Today we are going to go back to the basics though! Why know how far you are willing to go before marriage? I mean cant you just decide when it happens? You shouldn't have to plan it all out.. Yeah right! Within the last month or so Ive received a wholeee now outlook on this question. Ive already told you, but I do have a boyfriend and he is an amazing guy, but we are both still human. Also Ive told you that I moved into college and so over the last month or so Ive gained a large amount of freedom from my parents that I'm not use to. I'm saying all this to say right now you may not need to know how far you are willing to go with a guy. You may not have a boyfriend, your parents may be strict, or whatever the case is. Can I tell you though at some point you will need to know... whether it is with just a guy friend or boy friend. You need to know! It can totally change the some of the decisions you will doubt about it!

My parents and I have always had a great relationship, but they were rather strict and so it was always this is what they wanted, but now that I'm out of the house its a little different. I mean of course I still obey their wishes, but it isn't the same as when i was at home. It is now what do I think is right or wrong.

So...what do you think is to "far"? Write it down... it may sound dumb, but i cant tell you how long it took me before I would write mine down bc i was like if i mess up then i will just have to keep remembering that I messed up. Here is the deal... when i did finally write it down it was like i was giving it to God. It was written down and done. I prayed about it as I wrote it down. There was nooooo doubt in my mind that it was what He wanted me to do. Did I fight it for a while? Oh yes...for quite a while, but has God proven Himself faithful once i gave in and submitted to Him He has given me the strength to follow each one of my standards!

Where are your lines? Im not talking your parents... its great if yours agrees with theirs! Honestly mine are tougher than theirs. Do you even know? Its time to start thinking... NOW!

I am not ashamed of mine what so ever... For some of you mine may seem strict and for others they may seem not strict enough. Not to be rude, but I really do not care what you think... God and I have talked this over (More times than I can count!) and I have no doubt at all that this is where HE draws my lines!

~ I will not want to kiss a guy until my wedding day
~ I will not say, "I love you" until close to engagement
~ I refuse to have phone sex until Im married
~ Incase the others didnt cover this no sex, oral sex, or fingering before marriage either
~ Under normal circumstances I would not want to be alone for long periods of time with a guy until Im engaged
~ I will not do anything with a guy that I wouldnt want my future husband to see or do with another girl
~ I will continue to stay honest with my parents about any relationships I have
~More than any others... I will continue to stay clean before God concerning any relationships I have

Here are som verses that helped me come up with my standards! :)

1 Corinthians 6:13 Food for the stomach and the stomach for food—but God will destroy them both. The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body.

1 Corinthians 6:18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body.

Ephesians 5:13 But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people.

1 Thes 4:3 It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality.

So what are you standards? Share them with us if you would like to... we would love to hear them!



Anonymous said...

I have decided to go with court-ship instead of the world's idea of what a relationship is.the world say have as many boyfriends as you want and go as far as you want.I don't want the worlds idea of a relationship. I want a Godly relationship where I can look back and not think what was I thinking when I did that!

Katherine said...

Greatpost-I like how your list is individual to you, yet still so general.


Giann said...

Those are some pretty good standards!
But, I like to ask this....
Leslie Ludy said this, "Instead of asking 'how far is too far?' "He challenged [her and her husband] to ask the question, 'How far can we possibly go to honor Him[God] in this area of our lives?'"

I personally will ask that question even with my guy friends right now.

Great post Jen!

Anonymous said...

That sounds pretty much like my standards! I've decided to save my first kiss - and everything beyond that - for when I get married. I'm going to be insanely careful with hugs, too; only for whoever I am being courted by (who I am courting?).

Great post! This is definitely something I need to think about and decide for myself.

God bless.

Sierra said...

I thought you made a good point with this one:

I will not do anything with a guy that I wouldn't want my future husband to see or do with another girl I will not do anything with a guy that I wouldn't want my future husband to see or do with another girl

And I have decided no kissing until my wedding day as well.
And no tight hugs.
Just light one armed.
Awesome post!!!!!!!!!!!!