Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Where did your fairy tale dream go??

Where did our fairy tale dreams go??

Right down the drain just to be honest… I keep three year olds a couple times a week and it amazes me to see how big of an imagination they have and how easily they play Prince and Princess. Then within a couple of years (soon after puberty) they will barely even be able to remember their dreams. They will seem impossible and unrealistic. Why is that? It is because in our world women are taught that guys are jerks. They do not know how to respect or love us and that if we want anything in life we have to get it all on our own and in our own power. Is that the way God created it though? I do not believe it is at all… We’ve discussed this some, but what are the roles of the man and woman in the relationship? The man is to love his wife as God loved the church and the woman is to her husband. If we each did these things do you think life would be more like a fairy tell? I believe it would! Life can never be perfect, yet if we lived our lives the way God planned on us doing it would be a whole lot closer to a true fairy tale.



Ephesians 5:22-33 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church for we are members of his body. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.



So, what can we do about it? Can we push guys to show true love? What can we do? The truth is we can not change others… we can only change ourselves and the way we treat others. Bummer huh? I think we often miss the fact that if we were to treat guys with respect they might actually do the same thing to us! I remember watching a movie a while back and in the movie a dad didn’t respect his son at all. The son treated his dad the same way though. When someone confronted the son about it he wanted to blame his dad, but the person told him, “How can you judge your dad by his actions yet judge yourself by your intentions?” . The same goes for the way we treat guys… I do totally believe that there are guys that are “jerks”, “players”, or whatever you want to call them, yet I also believe that they are many good guys that we degrade when we classify all guys as bad. Does that make sense? With all that said, what can WE (You and I as girls!) do to change it? We’ve all heard the golden rule, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”. If we begin treating guys with respect I promise you they would begin doing the same to us… Do you know how our world would turn upside down if that actually began happening?? Of course not every guy will, but the ones who are worth having around will! It kills me how often women want to throw up the fact that their husbands are to love them as God loves the church, yet then they do not submit to their husbands, which is just as much God’s will as for the husband to love his wife! Before I go on though I want to give you some examples of what I mean… We’ve already discussed belittling guys by calling them names, but also just talking about them behind there back. It hurts them just as much as it hurts us to have someone talking about us behind our back. Making low remarks or degrading their attempts to be sweet. Even if it seems to be a sorry attempt, at least they are trying. Also in the clothes you wear… If you do not want a guy to look at you in a lustful way then please do not advertise yourself in such a way to make him want to! I realize that guys are guys and they are going to be drawn to women, but if you could realize how much easier it would be for a guy to respect you and treat you with honor if you dressed different I believe you would be getting rid of any clothes you own that might cause them to stumble. I feel like I’m rambling… but this is something that really means a lot to me. If we cant respect our guy friends or bf at this point then what on earth makes us think that all of the sudden we will be great at it once we get married?



With all that said I want to add one more thing… If the guys in your life are not worth respecting… please for your sake move on and find other guys. If the guys you hang around whether it be just friends or actual boyfriends curse around you often, hit you, or often push you to be physical it is about time to start looking for new friends! It wont be easy, but if you care to ever get back the fairy tale dream you use to have it is a must to get rid of those guys.



I love you girls and I want you to have the Fairy tale that you always dreamed of! :)
JEN

3 comments:

Anneliese said...

Well said! I didn't realise how important it was to treat guys with respect and honour until a few months ago, and then when I did, I noticed how we (that is, me, my mum and my sister) treat my dad appallingly! I didn't realise I was belittling him so much (kind of tricky when he's 6 foot 1...ok, bad pun, but you know what I mean! :P)...I felt absolutely awful when I realised what I was doing. So now I do my best to treat my dad with respect. I don't have any male friends or a boyfriend so my dad is the only male I can practise such a vital skill on.

I like how you said that if you don't treat the guys in your life with respect now, then how are you going to manage that once you're married? Good point. So I'm practising :)

God bless you!

Ashley said...

Great Post! I sure have missed being on here and reading everything. I will be emailing soon!
Love,
Ashley

Sierra said...

Great post and points(seriously how do you do it?).I admit that I do sometimes think of guys that way.I suppose that I need to work on that..as well as a bunch of other things:)
Sierra