Friday, November 6, 2009

How far is "Too" far?

The question is often asked, "How far is too far?"... I've searched through the Bible and read many books about purity. I have come to realize that each person has to consult with God and decide what they believe is right. Now this can be hard because it would be easy to do what "feels" good, although that may not be what God would have you do. So, instead of saying what is right or wrong I'm going to give you some verses that discuss purity and leave it up to you and God to decide what is ok for you!

1 Thessalonians 4: 3-8 It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you his Holy Spirit.

1 Corinthians 6:13Food for the stomach and the stomach for food"—but God will destroy them both. The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body.

1 Corinthians 6:18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body.

2 Timothy 2:22 Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.

Obviously, sex is out of the question, but what about other things? What about oral sex, anal sex, or simply phone sex? No matter what you want to call is still sex. God calls that impure.

So, now you have read these verses and you see what God says. It's time to get real... For me the hardest part was actually writing it down. Is making out ok? What about heavy petting, fingering, french kissing, etc? No matter what you may call it... you know what I'm talking about! My own personal standard is that i do not want to kiss a guy until my wedding day. To many of you that sounds absolutely insane, although that is what i feel God is calling me to do. Yours may be different though! I personally know that it is hard for me to say, "no" in the moment. Knowing where you are weak will help you know where you need to set more boundaries! These are a few things you might want to ponder.. If I'm alone with a guy and he begins to move his hands in certain places and wants to go past making out, will I be able to say stop? What about if your clothes begin coming off.... is that ok? You need to think about these things... Just an fyi... You my want to also already have an idea of the places where you are cool with him touching you and also the places that you are not cool with him touching. Also, are you willing to say, "I love you"? If so, then when? Remember, you do not have to do ANYTHING that you do not feel comfortable doing!! Do i need to say that again?? Please precious girls... do not fall for satan's lies that you have to or you are weird if you don't do these things!

One final thought as you are coming up with your standards. Remember that Jesus is with you at ALL times (Of course only if you have asked Him into your heart though!)...If that unnerves you then you may need to rethink some of the things that you are doing. In Hebrews 13:5b it says, "I will never leave you nor forsake you.". That is Jesus talking! The truth is He already knows what you are doing....whether you want Him to or not.

I want to hear your opinion! We are here to support each other!

Love you girls,


Rae!! said...

Jen that is awesome that you dont want to have your first kiss until you are married how romantic!! if some one would have slapped me up side the head and told me this stuff b4 i was a christain then i would love to be the same way. By all means you are not weird!! me and Chris are taking it really slow now Thanks so much for posting this bblog!!

A.V. said...

This Blog is Beast For Real!!!!!

Anonymous said...

hey do you have any advice on how to save your first kiss for the right guy????

Love Unawakened said...

My biggest answer to your question anonymous is by waiting. That was another reason that i decided to wait due to the fact that love is blinding! You know its so easy to "think" that he is the right guy, but what if he isnt? Then once you break up you have just given away a kiss to someone who you probably strongly dislike now. Its something worth thinking about! Also, you could wait until you are engaged. That way you know him really well, but it's not quite as long as waiting until your wedding day. Make sense? Hope this helps! :)

One final thought.... as crazy as it sounds, talk to your parents! They will be more open to letting you have relationships if you talk to them! They will help you know when your first kiss is ok and if it is a guy that you can trust your heart to. Even if they do make comments such as, "You will never date until you are 30!" they still have your best intrest at heart! :)


Anonymous said...

How do you figure that "obviously, sex is out of the question"?

None of the verses you referenced forbid premarital intercourse. They only forbid sexual immorality, and none of them define it.

Have you really examined the Bible that closely, or are you mainly using it to reaffirm what you've learned from reading "purity books"?