I'm in Colorado on my senior trip and borrowing a computer from someone so this is going to be short, but I did want to connect with you girls really quick!
Be ready to give an account... You most likely have heard this before and if you are like me when you hear it your first think about your testimony... Right? Well, Ive come to realize lately that it can mean a little more than that. What about being ready to stand strong in your purity standards, being willing to say what you think is right and wrong, knowing how far you are willing to go, and not being embarrassed by your convictions? That is also what this means to me! I had the chance with a couple other leaders this past wed night to talk about purity with the girls in the youth group and once I began to share and made the statement that I had never kissed a guy they seemed shocked. I just graduated high school and i had NEVER kissed a guy?! I could have easily backed down and been like welllll... *stammering* you know i just kinda chose not to, but I'm sure it would be easy to and just go on and on downplaying it. When the truth is Ive fought very hard to not kiss a guy or let a guy kiss me and when asked about it I should be ready to give an answer!
When asked how far you are willing to go... what is your answer? Can I just be frankly honest here and i know I'm about to step on some toes... Just saying, "I'm not going to have sex until I'm married." is NOT an answer... It can be part of one, but that is one of those answers like I'm not really sure, but i have to say something. Girls... know how far and be willing to proclaim it!! There is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of!
So here is my challenge to you... prepare for those questions! If you are living a pure life and one that is pleasing to God then you will without a doubt be asked about your standards. What will you tell them? It doesn't have to be a 30 minute answer....but it has to be from the heart and real.
Here is my normal answer (it varies some...all according to who is asking!)...just so you have an idea! Not saying mine is perfect by any means, but i can say that when i say it there is no reservation in me.
Person- So how far do you really think is "to far"?
Me- I kinda see it as a personal preference, but for me I choose to not kiss a guy until my wedding day!
Person- *shocked look* really....?
Me- Yeah! I know it sounds crazy, but i know that it is very easy for me to give into a guys wishes bc I'm a people pleaser, but if i know from the beginning that I'm not going to kiss him then it is easier to draw the line. I let the guy know from the beginning though... it sends some guys running, but others stay! ;) I also try to not put myself in a position with a guy where I would have to stop him. Not being alone, hanging with guys that sex isn't all they want, and just being honest from the beginning with them helps!
Person- What about "other" stuff though?
Me- Past that it is just pretty much whatever I wouldn't mind doing in front of God I will do with a guy... that pretty much means no real touching past holding hands, arms, or top of knees. Then as far as our words....nothing that i wouldn't say in front of my dad or his mom..... that stops alot! :)
Person- so are you against people kissing?
Me- oh no! Not at all. The thing is I know what my weaknesses are. So that is why I chose to draw the line where I did. For a strong willed girl who would have no problem saying STOP then I see no problem with kissing... it all has to do with the person though!
Person-ohhhh ok. Gotcha!
See, the point is to know where you stand, yet not seem degrading or demanding. I pray for each one of you as you think through this... it took me a while to get to where I was firm in my beliefs and it also took a few mistakes... but I pray that it doesn't take that for you!