Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Advice on Trustworthy Friends...

Hey girls, so something that has been on my heart a lot lately is trustworthy friends. And I was thinking about how trustworthy friends would apply to your relationships with guys. So tonight, let's look at it for this angle. You are interested in a guy, and in your eyes, he lines up with everything on your "list" that we discussed. So he's interested in you and long story short you're considering pursuing a relationship with him when you run it by a couple of friends. They don't think it's a good idea. Or maybe they do. Either way, they have an opinion about the guy. How do you interpret that? That's what I'd like to talk about tonight.

First of all, I'm discussing this on the premise of being "blinded by love" so to speak. Not saying you're in love with the guy, but that because of your attraction to him you are not paying attention what may or may not be deal breaking flaws. So while you may say to yourself, "I'll never be like that," I highly advise you not to. It's better to have your friends there for back-up than to send yourself into a bad relationship.

Okay, so back to interpreting the illustration. How we interpret our friends' opinions depends on how trustworthy and founded in Christ they are. Now if you have a "yes friend" who tells you what you want to hear, then obviously they're gonna say "go for it" no matter what the guy is like. I don't advise you trust these friends for this kind of thing. Now they may be the sweetest person on earth, but you need someone who is gonna be honest with you even when it hurts temporarily. So when they give their opinion, I'd automatically thank them, and find another friend.

Now if you have a friend that is what I call "brutally honest"-- they are gonna tell you the truth, and sometimes it's not easy to take at all-- I would trust them. But my advice here is to prepare yourself. When you talk to this person about a guy, or anything for that matter, know that they aren't afraid to present an opinion different than yours. But I love these kinds of friends, because even when it hurts to hear the truth now, I know that they've got back and that's why they told me the truth.

Now these are two extremes, and you may feel like you're somewhere in the middle. Not a "yes friend," but not "brutally honest" either. You may feel that you can speak the truth in love fairly well. You are an amazing friend! I'd advise you girls to stick with friends like these, they always have your back as well, and they are usually sooooo uplifting!

Trustworthy friends are important, because they aren't blinded by attraction to a boy. They can look at the big picture and say, "he's okay" or "steer clear girlfriend" with a clean conscience. I know that I can count on my friends to tell me if a guy I'm interested in is not good for me, and I'm so thankful for that. I strongly encourage you girls to find some trustworthy friends who have your best interests at heart!

Love, Kat

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